Woohooo! That turned out better than I’d originally anticipated. Last year I won 2nd prize but I had nothing to live up to that this year. Thought I’d wear an old Angel costume of mine with motorized flapping wings and go out dancing tonight but I remembered my halo broke, so I went to the costume store to get a new one this afternoon.

Saw this rubber old-school alien mask with attached purple cape and thought it’d be a great half-assed costume with my disco ball dress, silver boots, purple tights and some silver duct tape for my wrists. All things I really do just happen to have laying around on an average day. Bought a ray gun too and set off with the intention of staying in character under the mask all night and hamming it up, because a big costume like that needs overacting and no one’d know who I was and that’d be a laugh.

Started off badly as I parked much too far away, I couldn’t see shit in that mask because when I’d breathe I’d fog up the eyes from the inside, and my tights were falling down…. badly… like when I walked the top would roll down and they weren’t even on my hips anymore. if I’d let ‘em go they’d have gone down below my crotch entirely .

Made a round around the club and I was blind and my pants were falling down so I stopped in the bathroom to sort it all out and made a 2nd round and things were even worse the 2nd time. Considered going home and giving up but instead I tied a knot in the top of my tights and poked the eyes out of my mask and then everything got all much more manageable.

Then things got good. Because I really was able to ham it up like I’d intended. I went up on the stage, which folks dance on when they have dance parties. Went right to the front center and put my arms out like I was addressing the crowd. People loved it.

I spent the whole night shooting people with my ray gun and doing funny little dances with random people as they passed by. It was really fun. I was totally shocked they gave me 3rd prize even though I had a store-bought mask but they said that I won them over by staying in character all night.

The 2nd and 1st prize winners were Stevie Wonder and Oscar The Grouch. Both totally deserved their win over me.

Now I’m under pressure to win again next year.